i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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