Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
