Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
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