We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Randomize
