They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
