so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Randomize