My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
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