I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Randomize