If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
