honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Please don't give away my fajitas
Randomize
