How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
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