i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Randomize
