1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Two words: blizzard sex
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Randomize
