Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
