just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
