And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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