we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
