It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
