...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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