Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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