So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
