It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
