So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Randomize
