I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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