all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
