I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Randomize
