im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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