I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Less talking, more tequila
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Randomize
