If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize