You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
