Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
i think im in europe. pls send help
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Randomize
