She went from zero to smokin in five shots
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
