Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Randomize
