He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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