I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
