All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
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