Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize
