So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Randomize