D3 body, D1 cock
My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
It all started with a game of naked twister.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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