there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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