goodnight i made you a song goodbye
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
