I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Randomize
