Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Randomize
