talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Randomize