did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
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