Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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