kristin has been a bad kristin
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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