i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
Randomize
