The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
