how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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