is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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