omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
He? As in you personified your dick?
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
